FETA 2017 Christmas Party Under Trump Administration is a Smash Hit; 

"Yuge" Turnout, Biggest Ever, 

Over 11,650 People Attend!

Kellari Taverna on West 44th Street in Manhattan hosted the 2017 FETA (Federation of EthnicGreek Trade Associations) annual Christmas party which was sponsored by three prestigious law firms: 

Gallo Vitucci Klar

Margolis Edelstein

Welby, Brady & Greenblatt 

FETA would once again like to thank these sponsors for their generous support.  Below are some photos from the party, as captioned by President Trump's press secretary.  Enjoy! 

Optical illusions (and Crooked Hillary) may make this crowd look somewhat smaller than 11,650 people, but trust us, it was yuge!  And we had all the best words in our conversations. 

 Tal Harpaz(opoulos), a guest of Margolis Edelstein's, poses with who she thought was George Clooney but, it turns out, it was the SEC! Clooney had to cancel at the last minute, although he is rumored to be playing the SEC in the upcoming film "The FETA Story."  

Andy Harlfinger of One Beacon, also a guest of Margolis Edelstein, exhibits a new strategy in using his name tag for multiple purposes. Besides identifying him, it also serves as a napkin to protect his sweater from falling food and, additionally, it blocks the exposure of unsightly chest hairs. Bravo!  Also pictured: Paul Carbone of the Margolis firm (it's actually him, not a carbone copy) and Tal Harpazopoulos.   

SistaKapsomera and SistaDiamantis asked to be photographed with BroZach so that they'd look better in comparison. A common ploy. Ladies, you look maaaahvalous! 

Guests George Panagopoulos and Yannis Legakis discuss how they are often mistaken for being Irish based on their last names.   

BroJordanGeorgeMichael, BroScaryfaces, SistaE-Fabulous and BroPaschos (all of whom look better than ever) hop on the "Pose with BroZach (far left)" bandwagon. To his credit, however, the women tell us that BroZach has very long fingers (by now, hopefully, you've picked up on the Trump theme).   

BroTeddyKouridis throws his arm around BroJimBrownopoulos while discussing all of the cases that Ironshore isn't sending to BroJim's law firm. Get on that BroTed! 

 

Some of the revelers discuss the fact that President Trump is the best-looking U.S. president ever. They also marvel at the fact that every living U.S. citizen was at the inauguration.  

BroBrownopoulos and BroFredMarrakis of Ironshore discussed the most recent advancements in quantum physics. BroFred was obviously on his way to Studio 54, where a few more shirt buttons would be undone later in the evening. Control yourselves ladies!  PS Fred: Please see Andy Harlfinger's use of a name tag above.  

Following doctor's orders, BroJordanGeorgeMichael supplements some painkillers with a healthy dose of ouzo ("Take four shots and call me in the morning if you can remember anything," was the exact prescription.) Researchers at the Centers for Disease Control in Atlanta recently said that ouzo is effective in treating pneumonia, heart disease and butter face. 

Revelers take a short break from guzzling ouzo to enjoy some of the fine culinary fare offered by Kellari Taverna. A surprise I.C.E. (https://www.ice.gov/) inspection of the Kellari kitchen revealed no illegal immigrants (although there were five at the party). President Trump was pleased.   

SistaEveAnnCasablanca is flanked by BroPaschos and BroMichaelJordanGeorge. Note all of the strategic photo angles from above in order to obscure double and triple chins and protruding nose hairs (not with respect to the ladies, of course...) 

Kudos to SistaPopi for organizing yet another splendid FETA Christmas party. And she almost looks happy about it! 

SistaE-Fabulous asked the SEC to pose for her Facebook profile photo.  Her friends will be surprised to learn that she knows Geo. Clooney. 

Another photo to convince us that BroTeddyBearStefas and BroNeilDiamondDiamantis must have vast concealed wealth to attract these fine yenekas. It's the only reasonably explanation that we can conceive with respect to these short-fingered FETAn brothers. LeBron James doesn't even play this high above the rim. 

BroScaryFaces donated $500 to a charity for claims managers with disfigured faces and personality disorders for the privilege of being photographed with the SEC. He said the name of it is "The Human Fund."  

And, finally, to close our FETA photographic festival of fun, SistaPope poses with BroStopAndSmellTheVoses. Many of the 11,650 attendees had left the party by this point. The greatest time ever was had by all at this "yuge" success of a party (paid for, in part, by the people of Mexico).  

We hope to see you at the next FETA event!  

Spring Fling 2016 - Making FETA Great Again!

FETA (Federation of EthnicGreek Trade Associations for those of you linking to this blog from the People Magazine or Academy Awards websites) held it's 87th Annual Spring Fling at KEFI on the Upper West Side last night. 

By all accounts (and this is really the only account you'll get) it was a rousing success, even more so than BroKambo's lingerie modeling career or BroJimmy's short-lived stint competing in a spelling bee (when did people start spelling "cat" with a "c?").

Once again, we'd like to give a shout out to SistaPope, who organized the party, and, of course, our generous sponsors: 

Gallo Vitucci Klar LLP 

Kaufman, Dolowich & Voluck

Margolis Edelstein 

Sheehy, Ware & Pappas, PC

For your viewing pleasure, here are some snaps from last night's soiree (the SEC would've taken more but he ran out of film for his Polaroid Land camera): 

An aerial view of the raucous crowd (drone provided by Boeing)

BroDandelion attaches himself to guest Jeremy Dietch(opoulos). 

 Here we see SistaEA-Casablanca sporting her new "Blonde Ambition Tour" look for guest Jim Brown(opoulos) of Margolis Edelstein, a firm that has never lost a case and has never had a client complain about anything (hey, if you sponsor our party we're happy to spew some BS on your behalf!) 

New member BroKhaki-Kakoullis enjoys his first FETA party along with BroKaraCostco, SistaG-Miz (new nickname since the SEC can't remember the previous), new member SistaChristian (who was motoring quite a bit during the party) and BroJimTard who was sporting his new Gro (Greek afro).  

A group shot: SistaEA-Casablanca, Jim Brownopoulos, Ray Tiburzi-anos, new member BroKryptonite and our hostess, SistaPope.  

 You've already seen this group but without BroJimTard in the photo they look much more attractive.  

The SEC wore a yellow shirt to commemorate the anniversary of the Greek army's victory in the Yellow War of 385 BC. fought in Mongolia and Krapistan  [That's total BS but some of you probably believed it for a second...]

BroTeddyBear Stefas smiles at being allowed to appear in a photo with his lovely wife SistaGeorgiaPeach. Also pictured: SistaE-Fabulous and BroTedKordonBleu (another new nickname; it's hard to keep track of 97 nicknames people so get over yourselves!) 

BroKhaki enjoys some delicious chow while temporarily in New Member Time Out.  Not pictured: Any other FETAns.  

BroZach wows SistaEA-Casablanca with a tale of the latest accounts he's brought in for Integro: The Trump campaign's libel/slander coverage and the Trade/Credit policy for Britain's business deals as a member of the EU. 

 New member BroKryptonite appears thrilled to be photographed with BroDandelion and SistaPope. He's single-handedly bringing the clip-on tie back into fashion. Shirt/tie combination provided by Dollar Tree. SistaPope's dress by Armani.  

BroZach succinctly sums up the prevailing sentiment of the evening. 

Yasou kids, we hope to see you at the next FETA event! 

FETA Party at PLUS 2015 in Dallas

As is FETA's custom, the organization through a very lavish party at the annual PLUS Conference, which was held this year at the the Anatole Hilton in Dallas.  Before the party, former U.S. President George Bush met with FETAns to discuss the Middle East situation, the Greek economy and the proper pronunciation of the word "nuclear."

Thanks again to our generous sponsors, FOLEY & MANSFIELD and KAUFMAN DOLOWICH VOLUCK (and to London Fischer, which offered to sponsor but wasn't actually called upon to pay, hopefully next time...)

Here are some photos from the event for your viewing pleasure:

 George Clooney was the celebrity keynote speaker at the conference.

Try to spot the AIG senior executive in this photo and the two lawyers 

who would like more business from his company.  

 BroSpiroBantis entertains the crowd with a compelling tale  

of his recent victory on a Rule 45.R (2-2) T.54-e (5.643) victory.

 All you need to know about this photo is BroZach, that says it all. 

 A great example of how not to take a photo at a party.  

Ray T., a senior claims manager at an unnamed insurance company (protecting his privacy), explains to BroDandelion why his company only hires attorneys who wear ties to insurance parties. 

Mr. Clooney stopped by the FETA party before his keynote address.  

Some non-FETAn sponsors were granted admission to the exclusive FETA soiree.  

The flying insurance bus heads back to the Northeast after the 

conference concluded. Another FETA PLUS Party is in the books! 

FETA Spring Fling Party 2015

FETA held a Spring Fling on Wednesday, June 24th at Mad 46 Cafe on the rooftop of the Roosevelt Hotel in NYC.  The event, organized by SistaPope (Popi Kousis), was a rousing success. FETA management would once again like to extend a sincere thanks to our event sponsors:

Foley & Mansfield 

Gallo Vitucci Klar LLP 

Gordon, Rees, Scully & Mansukhani LLP 

Kaufman Dolowich Voluck.  

Here for your viewing pleasure are some photos from the festivities: 

BroKouridis strikes his famous "Blue Steel" pose in the hopes of being discovered for a role on "CSI" by BroPsycho's actress wife. Unfortunately, she never showed and BroKouridis's face was frozen in this pose for three hours (hey, your mother always warned you.)  

BroNeilDiamond explains to BroMichaelJordanGeorge why he never brings him flowers anymore.  It was nice of BroJordan to wear his 4th-best golf shirt to the party.  

BroPsycho, sadly, pretends that he's talking to his wife (who couldn't attend the party because she was busy at a private meeting in L.A. with Ben Affleck.) 

SistaChristmas, BroFlowerPower, PowerBroKardashian and SistaPope provide a fetching photo for future FETA recruitment brochures (not pictured PowerBroKardashian's sportcoat and tie; sometimes you can't even dress them up...) 

BroZach casts a striking profile photo.  Obscured behind BroZach's prodigious nose is BroNeilDiamond (look hard and you can see him) explaining why his next daughter will be named Sweet Caroline. On the right BroShortBus looks for BroPsycho's wife. 

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A staple of every FETA party: A close-up photo of BroKambo that can be reproduced and posted in gardens to ward off rodents. Enlarged copies of this picture are also effective in keeping burglars away from your home and discouraging trick-or-treaters from entering your property on Halloween.  

FETA is not above hiring professional models to class-up our parties.  We didn't do that here, obviously, but we might in the future. Seriously though, great shot of the ladies! 

Members of FETA throw shade on PowerBroKardashian for his casual attire which totally dragged down the party. 

BroKouridis finally breaks free of his "Blue Steel" pose and reacts to news that his employer, Ironshore, is being sold by its Chinese owner to ISIS. 

SistaTheana meets with all of Allied World's satisfied insureds. 

BroZach's grandfather made the trip over from Greece to join the festivities.    

SistaGinaLollbrigida enjoys a brief break from the 22 hours-a-day billing requirements of her employer, WEMED.

BroFlowerPower serves as a (piss poor) substitute for BroPsycho's absent wife (not pictured: BroPyscho's wife and Ben Affleck)

BroZach and BroNeilDiamond avert their eyes, albeit momentarily, from SistaChristmas's see-through shirt.  Oh, wait, sorry, it was only an "outer shirt." Whatevs.  SistaChristmas tightly grips her pepper spray just in case. 

BroDandelion cozies up to SistaEveAnnCasablanca. Seconds later, when he learned that she doesn't control claims legal work at Axis, he briskly walked away.  

You've heard of the St. Pauli Girl? FETA has the St. Patti Girl. Here SistaEllaFitzgerald wields a tray of ouzos while BroDandelion cozies up to her.  Upon learning that she doesn't control claims legal work at Arch, BroDandelion briskly walked away.  Damn, he put on the blazer for nothing.   

PowerBroKardashians falls prey to SistaLambrOuzo's best come-hither look, which is especially impressive given that she just brought gorgeous little Alice into the world a few months ago. Bravo! 

The unsuspecting crowd at Avra, site of a post-party FETA dinner, sits calmly before the FETA storm is unleashed...

A rag-tag group of FETAns (is there any other kind?) enjoys excellent cuisine and some warmed-over conversation after the Spring Fling.


As always, a great time was had by all.  Thanks again to SistaPope and our sponsors for making this enjoyable evening possible.  We hope to see you all at the next FETA event!